Very very cool

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3vS3LGH5gs[/youtube]

War of the Worlds

Woah!

Ninja (my wife) & I had the pleasure of going to the live version of Jeff Wayne’s War of the Worlds last Saturday night.

And it was the greatest live event I’ve ever been to, partly because of it’s nostalgic nature. Wayne’s original soundtrack came out in the era of my life that also spawned the first Star Wars movie.

Wayne’s music, Richard Burton’s flawless narration and of course HG Wells’ brilliant original story: and now live – at a volume that drove it through my stomach wall! Very very cool!

Anyway, just thought I’d gloat… Heh heh

She’s Apples

That title is another wierd Aussie expression whose origin is mysterious. It basically means “it’s good” or “everything’s cool.”

In this case, it was my oh-so-clever way to introduce you readers to Chris Owen at Pink Apple, a relationships specialist here in Melbourne who does some tremendous work helping couples revitalise their, well, relationship.

Personally, I think she has way too much fun in her job to truly call it work, but she’s certainly been instrumental in many many couples keeping their sanity and keeping their marriages.

Now I know this is a website written by a guy for guys. A “relationships specialist” may not sound like a funky topic to introduce to a group of blokes hanging out at the pub. But if you want things to be better than they are, (maybe you’ve experienced a … lack of spark in … certain areas of your marriage) – you may be able to find the relevance here. If we service our cars and boats and motorbikes, our marriage could probably do with a service occasionally too…

To get the gist of Chris’s services (without paying!) try her Take the Pulse of Your Relationship quiz.

And here’s a sample of her writing:

Not the Kitchen Sink.

It’s very tempting when we’re angry with someone, be it our partner, colleague, or the Indonesian government, to avoid letting all our peripheral or past judgments, come into the debate.   [more]

Links Ahoy!

What’s that? You say you have an hour up your sleeve and ya wanna read some quality writing on a smattering of topics that’s also grouped together under a couple of themes?

Well, why didn’t you say so earlier!

Here’s the fallout from 2 Writers’ Carnivals which concluded in the last week or so.

1. What I Learned from…

• … Writing Online: It Does Make a Difference, by Rosa Say at Joyful Jubilant Learning
• … My Chaotic Life, by Gavin Heaton at Servant of Chaos
• … Seth Godin, by Bill Austin at Arizona High Tech Talent Partnership
• … Phil Mickelson at the Deutsche Bank Championship, by Herman Najoli at Epic Flow
• … (blank), by Patrizia Broghammer at VOIP
• … My Client’s Expectations, by Karin H. at The Kiss Business Too
• … What Have You Done So Far This Year, by Samara Leigh at Mindful Banter
• … Changing My Children’s School, by Pete Aldin at Freaked Out Fathers
• … Changing My Blog Template Every 15 Minutes, by Troy Worman at Orbit Now!
• … networking out of my comfort zone, by Joanna Young at Confident Writing
• … Mother Theresa, by Anna Lenardson at Anna’s Attic
• … Change…ing Majors, by Sam Brougher at Forest Azuaron
• … Change, by Bob Glaza at One Reader at a Time
• … not (quite) changing, by Jon Swanson at Levite Chronicles
• … 3 Things I Learned From Change, by Phil Gerbyshak at Slacker Manager
• … Phil Mickelson: Applications for Change, by Herman Najoli in a follow-up to his first post listed above at Epic Flow
• … Changing My Shopping Habits, by Laura Spencer at Writing Thoughts
• … Getting Up Early, by the Homeschool Diva at Homeschool Diva

and of course last, but hopefully not least –

• … Network Marketing, by Robert Hruzek at Middle Zone Musings

2. How the War was Won:

• How I Won One Battle in the War With a Lesser Self by Joe of FatheredFive.com
• Winnin’ tha War on Them Cowboys! by Karin H
• How I Won The War On… Terror (…Just to give it a nice APEC flavour…) by The Molk
• How I won the war on BLOGGING by William Tully
• How I beat the snooze button. by Mat Newton
• How I Won the War on Work by Rosa Say
• How I Won the War on… that Stupid Pipe by bob Hruzek
• How I’m Winning the War on Brain-Chaos! by some Pete Aldin guy.

Can’t say you’ve got nothing to do now, can ya? Press that button and go read something else…

 

Zombie Brings Out Best in Children

You know, being a Dad is so counter-intuitive at times. It’s like: do the opposite of what “should” work and you’ll get the effect you wanted but weren’t actually trying to get at the time. (The whole counter-intuitive thing is why I called my business Great Circle, but that’s another story). 

Act like an adult and your kids whine and rebel and complain and squabble and make bedtime a chore for the parents.

Act like a kid and …well … they treat you (and each other) with respect and even take responsibility for themselves. What gives?

Tonight, at 7 o’clock, overcome with an inexplicable sense of fun and silliness, I played 20 minutes of Zombie Tag. It’s basically as it sounds: I behave like a Zombie, shirt half over my head, eyes crossed, dragging one leg behind me and making sounds that probably had the neighbours phoning the police. Meanwhile my boys scurry away, staying just out of arms’ reach (until they get sick of being chased and want a turn at being the Zombie).

When the game was over, I said “Ok, Youngest Son, it’s your bedtime. I’m just going to wash a few dishes, then I’ll be in to read you a story.” Then Oldest Son (who was fighting with his brother and his mother only last night) says “It’s ok Dad. You don’t have to do both. You do the dishes and I’ll read him a story.”

Uh?! Did I hear right?

Oldest Son went on to sing a song to the youngest, having read him that bedtime story. Then he came and wiped up a sink full of dishes.

Meanwhile Youngest Son brushed his teeth having only been asked twice (not twelve or thirteen times) and even cleaned up the mouthwash he spilled instead of leaving it for me or mum to find when it had congealed…

Who needs Supernanny? My kids respond well to Zombies. Apparently.

More Dog Safety for Kids

Here’s some more instructions for Kids, lifted from other websites…

If a dog approaches you:

• Don’t run away and scream.
• Stand very still, “like a tree.” (See first picture below.)
• Avoid making direct eye contact with the dog.
  If you fall or are knocked down, act “like a log.” (See second picture below.)
  When the dog understands that you are not a threat, it will probably walk away.
  If a dog bites you, tell an adult right away.

So both this post and the last on the topic have had some good information. Like most subjects, this information is easily understood by adults – but how do we get this across to kids?

My suggestions to begin with would include the following but maybe you have some more to add in the comments area?

• show the child what you mean with a picture or soft toy! (How often do you just filter out what people are saying to you? Kids do it more.) For example, you raise the teddy bear’s “hackles” (fur behind the head) to show the child what that looks like.
• help them understand the relevance by telling a story (we all need to know WHY the information is important before we listen and apply it).
• make a time specifically devoted to talking through this subject; don’t sandwich it in between brushing their teeth and grabbing their schoolbag in the morning or part of the dinner table conversation. Avoid distractions while talking about it.
• go back over the points with them often. Ask them questions about it. Give them quizzes with a prize. Get them saying the information back to you (until they say in frustration “I know this!” and then ask them once more! )

You can read more on this important subject here.

What I’m Learning from Changing My Children’s School

A big thanks to Robert Hruzek for hosting his “What I Learned from …” Writers Carnival. This piece probably isn’t exactly what he had in mind. (But he’ll get over it! )

What intrigued me about his topic was that he wanted us to talk about what we learned from change. I had always thought that you learn something and then you make a change because of it. But in thinking about this I realised that sometimes you make a Huge Change because the circumstances are demanding it – and you learn during the process and from the process itself.

So here’s what I’m learning this week from the potentially stressful process of uprooting our boys from a school they’ve loved and transfering them to a new one…

1) It’s Never Worth Staying in an Unhealthy Situation Just Because it Seems Easier.

We often stay in situations that aren’t good for us, that we even hate, simply because it’s painful or scary to change. But pain has no accent – in other words, we think pain means something bad is happening but it may not be. It may actually be that things are improving.

My back hurts. Every day. It also hurts to exercise. Sometimes the dull ache of backpain seems more attractive to live with than the more acute pain of exercise. But that acute pain eventually fades and the exercise puts me in a place where my back pain diminishes further, if I press through it.

Have I labored the point enough?

It became clear to my wife and I a couple of weeks ago that to leave our sons in a school that literally overnight exchanged a culture of nurture and excellence for an atmosphere of anger arrogance and “amateurism” would be negligent … and just plain dumb!

2) Change is a Before, During & After Process.

Before: We had to

• do our homework/research
• prime our kids
• ramp up the reassurance and security with Youngest Son
• ramp up the information-flow and transparency with Oldest Son
• set up a playdate for Youngest Son with a boy who would be in his class next year (so that he had a friend already “waiting” for him in the new situation)

During: Now that they both know it’s definitely happening, it’s been more of the same above while wearing an aura of calm, & managing time well to make more time for their friends (so they don’t feel like we’re ripping them away from the people they love).

After: … Well, we’re not there yet. We anticipate the usual “teething” troubles that come with any new situation. Our intention is to

• remain positive about the new school
• optimistically navigate our way through new systems and routines
• keep lots of space open to talk through the difficulties of the New

It takes great care at all stages to navigate change well. So far, so good.

3) Generation Ys (& Zs) Crave Information.

Let’s face it, they’ve been swimming in information all their lives. To withhold it in a time of great change is destined to create great anxiety and conflict in your family.

Some of the commentators I’ve read say that generally, given the information, kids these days make pretty solid decisions. While that’s debatable, I have found that my kids do seem to make some pretty good choices (or go with our flow) when we provide enough of the information they need (rather than adopting the “Trust me, I’m your father” non-discussive approach).

It impressed me to watch the Principal at the new school (during the initial interview with Oldest Son). He took the boy’s questions seriously and answered them fully.

We’ve been upfront with the reasons for the move…

In a time of change, information is like oxygen.

4) Kids are Resilient and Fragile at the Same Time.

Kids were created to grow. Change is a Growing Time. They will grow through it – and grow well – if we parents handle them and the transition with care.

For me, the lesson continues. But this is what I’ve learned so far…

Dog Safety for Kids

We owned a greyhound briefly. Great dog: compliant, friendly, placid.

Not a good dog for kids though, first because he had never learned to play (he’d been a racing dog before we adopted him) and second because of his size (a small misdemeanour became a big one because of this). One day our then-4-year-old suprised him when he was sleeping and he bit out, catching the boy on his lip. It was only a minor cut (thank you God!) but the red flag went up.

“Rocky” (the dog not the boy!) had to find a more appropriate home.

Wish I’d spent the time on dog education before that incident.

Here’s the essentials to teach kids:

Don’t go near strange dogs in the street or park.

Tell an adult about any stray dogs.

Never bother a dog that is eating, sleeping or caring for puppies.

Leave the dog alone if it raises the hair on its back, lifts its lip or growls (it’s not playing)

If you want to pat a dog at someone’s house, ask permission from the owner and make sure the owner is with you and watching when you do.

Always have an adult with you when you play with a dog.

When you play with a dog for the first time, put the back of your hand out slowly for the dog to sniff. If the dog offers you its head, don’t pat it on top of the head but gently rub under its chin or chest

Never tease a dog, never tease a dog, never tease a dog!

Don’t squeal (this works well at keeping adults from attacking you too!)

(More later…)