We’re Romping and We Need Your Help!

My son Jack and I (official team photo here) are joining the Melbourne City Romp, part of the fight to save lives and we need your support! Help us raise $1000 to go directly to the Burnet Institute’s research team. Up to 20,000 Rompers from across Australia are expected to take part and help support Burnet’s Romp for a Cure fundraising initiative. All funds go DIRECTLY to Burnet’s fight against The ‘Big Three’: HIV, TB and malaria, some of the world’s worst infectious diseases.

Now I realise that you, like me, get bombarded with requests to help, probably daily. But what if I was asking you for only $10 … With over 100 Facebook friends PLUS ALL OF YOU FOF FANS chipping in that $10, we’d have our $1000 in no time! And Burnet would be closer to a cure.

YOU DON’T HAVE TO ATTEND TO CHEER US ON. (WE’RE SO FAST, YOU’D NEVER FOLLOW US ANYWAY!!).

Follow this link to our team page where you’ll find prompts to make your donation: http://www.melbournecityromp.com/team_profile/1361  

By the way, this was Jack’s idea and I’m proud of him for suggesting it. What’s wrong with young people these days? Where’d they get this social conscience???

We appreciate your partnership!! May life be good to you!!

Saving $$$

I don’t know about you, folks, but teaching kids to save money has been an important thing to me, and something that I practised from the time they first earned pocket money. It was always an uphill battle, as kids see money and want to spend it (just like I do).

One of the disciplines I instilled in them was to give them a saving target – either an item they wanted to buy or an amount (say $20 for an 8 year old). I also for a while insisted that they save half of their allowance while free to spend the remainder as soon as they wanted (= immediately).

And then I have relatives whose kids own shares by the time they’re 13 or buy their own xboxes in record time because of the saving habits and work ethics they’ve developed.

So what practises do you use in your family when it comes to kids and finances?

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In other news, I’m currently on holidays, so if I don’t reply, I”m not ignoring you. Feel free to comment and have a grand old conversation amongst yourselves without me. Just don’t be one of those jerks who tries to fill my comments pages with swearwords and links to naughty sites .

(Loosely) Related Posts:

• What Would MacGyver Do?
• New Dads

Intentionality and Parenting

Dads out there, if I’ve learned nothing else in my time, I’ve learned the following…

You can let life happen to you. You can let life happen to your kids. You can let events control your family, determine your actions, shape your thinking, take their own course and carry you or your kids with them.

Or ….

You can wrestle with life, negotiate with it, make a dent in your obstacles. You can shape events, you can surf them! You can determine your own actions and responses. You can set the wheels in motion. You can be creative and adapt. You can find another way forward. You can be engaged with your kids. You can be involved. You can grow. You can learn. You can be intentional, purposeful…

And you can teach your children to do the same.

Intention.

You can build a closer relationship with your kids.

Intention.

You can change the status quo if you don’t like it.

Intention.

You can create outcomes that fill you with pride, or at the very least make an effort that you can be proud of!

Intention.

Intention determines your results far more than the forces over which you have no control. Far more than your own demons or flaws.

What are your hopes for your children? What is your goal for your family? Who do you want to be, as a Father, as a Man?

Intentionality, creativity, purpose, perserverence. Man. These are your birthright … and they can be your legacy.

Steppin’ Up to the Plate

 My Fellow Father, when it comes to parenting, don’t let life pressure you to “sit this one out”.

As one writer says: “Fathers Are Primary Parents!”  There ain’t no 2nd fiddle in the Parenting Orchestra. (Sorry, that was a wierd analogy, didn’t really work, I’ve now mixed the sporting and music metaphors, I should have cut it out!)…

Here are some excerpts from Patty Wipfler’s “Primary Parents” article:

Dads get a raw deal. The pressure to earn a living often has a desperate thread woven through it: there’s a sense that if you don’t provide, dire things will happen to your family! We live in a society in which the lack of any safety net for families translates to a feeling of “life and death” for Dads around work issues. And when work must be pursued in a worrisome way, exhaustion is not far behind. Long hours, worry, heavy expectations, an ever more uncertain working environment, and the threat of poverty all make it harder to enjoy our children. It’s also hard to think independently about ourselves as Dads and as men: what do we want to do with our lives, how do we really want to live, what’s important to us?

One point that’s important to clarify is that fathers are absolutely primary parents. Children want, need, and love their Daddies. Some children grow up without the benefit of a Dad, and they manage well, but you need to know that, whatever your parenting circumstance, your child wants you close!

Children often look like they favor their Moms, and that when the chips are down, it’s Mom they want to stroke their forehead or kiss their hurt or listen to the tale of their hard day. But this is usually just the result of cultural circumstance: Mom is nearby more often when the chips are down, because in our culture, Dad usually spends more time at work. (In families in which the Dad stays home, the children gravitate to him in hard times, and it’s the Mom who has to work to keep from living on the emotional outskirts of the family.) You don’t have to remain on the emotional outskirts of your children’s lives!

… Listening to each other, hearing other Dads talk about parenting and about what’s important to them is a first step to climbing out of living under obligation. Just hearing how life is for other Dads can help bring a sense of perspective to our lives…

What helps children grow close are simple things any Dad can do:

• Your children love play, especially physical play.
• Your children want you to listen to their feelings, not to correct them.When children have played all-out, they feel safe enough to bring up heavy emotions.
• Your children want your life to be good.Go ahead and set limits that you think make sense, limits that allow your life to be good, too.

I recommend a full read of the article to see how Patty develops these ideas.

Ultimately, this reminded me that we Dads need to step up to the “crease” (if we’re in a cricketing country like Australia or the UK) or up to the “plate” (if baseball is your game of choice). We need to engage. Today. No one’s going to do our job for us … and women can’t. (Yes, they can parent. Duh! But they can’t father, and nor should they have to).

Enjoy your kids today…